friendship

so. Life has been busy. We got snowed-in in Okotoks last weekend. That was exciting. Lots of snow, movies, family drama, and friends. The weeks have been slow when we think about how many days till daddy's done school, and fast when I look back. We have been doing so much and really digging our teeth into life. Little Em too, who, since the last sleep post, has decided maybe sleep isn't so fun. (actually I think has got a gassy upset tummy so we're starting a homeopathy program today...lets hope it works!!!) So sleeplessly we have been cooking curries galore (hubby thinks that may be the cause of em's night waking...perhaps...), baking pumpkin pie, playing trucks, playing in the snow, a little painting, a little crochet, and a lot of dreaming.

I ve been enjoying my friend's blog posts...so much great stuff out there. Ive been thinking about friendship...what it is, how to be better at it, how to appreciate it. Ive never been very good socially, Im a hermit at heart, and I just feel always like I am trying too hard when it comes to 'hanging out'. That must be an oxymoron - "trying" to hang out. As if doing nothing is hard work - but to me it is.

I was listening to a podcast of an interview with an old family friend, who talks about authentic relationships and I realize boy, are there any authentic relationships that dont include yammer about child raising, cooking, where to get the best snow gear, or how to save money at the grocery store? Not that these things are a problem, just when they start to become the core of your friendships. Then you find yourself in a situation where friends come and go, and you really dont care too much. And you're just chatting to fill in the lonely blanks. So, thats what I'm feeling right now anyway. Im always working on my social graces. I feel a little silly saying it, but maybe I need some practice. Is anyone out there happy in their social life? Is it even possible? Anyways, here's a post to say that I would love to find a way to have rich, authentic and warm friendships. Wouldnt you?

inspiration

I found looking through my old art books is a fun activity to do with my son. Actually its probably more fun for me, but it allows me those few minutes each day of relief.

Let me explain: my son has started repeating, endlessly, the phrase "play with me mommy". Sometimes I think he says it out of habit because it will come out of his mouth, even while we are actually playing. Now you many think that I should get him out to play with kids more or that this is caused by him not having enough peers. But the truth is we go out daily, and upon our return home, within seconds he starts his little song "play with me...play with me...play with me..." It is sorta driving me crazy, Because "playing" is fun and all, but I may loose my mind after hours of the "hello" game. (a game he invented where two vehicle converse, starting with the simple greeting "hello"). - OK I know its good for his development of conversational skills... but please!

So, I think having a simple discussion about Art is a healthy break. "Look M, there is a horse in this painting, how fascinating, look at the colours." "yes, mommy, I like the red one"...It lasts, oh a mere few minutes, but the bliss, I tell you. He knows how to please me by making these thoughtful comments, like the one above...so sweet.

Anyways, I was looking through the art book I received as an award for grade 12 art. Yes I received the grade 12 art award. This was cool. In it I found some emails that I received from my grade 12 art teacher while I was living in the Yukon...about a month before she very suddenly and unexpectedly passed away.

So, I spent the morning in tears reading those emails, thinking of how encouraging she was of me, and how ambitious and naive I was back then, and wishing soooo hard that I could just talk to her again, ask her advice, and get a critique. She was such a mentor for me. I forgot how kind she was, and how caring she was of me. I hope that wherever she now is she is filling me with inspiration and is guiding my hand in the work I do.

Thanks Anna-Marie, these ones are for you.

"SHARE!"

Its hot out. Many people complain. They say - "Oooooo how can you stand being pregnant in August - it must be so horrible this heat!" I have swollen feet. That sucks. But otherwise, I am more afraid of this summer whizzing by and leaving us all in a brown, dry, empty winter. I am panicking that we wont not get to swim, eat ice cream, go to the creek, play in the hose, enjoy our garden, sit like vegetables on the porch, have bar-b-ques, let the two year old run around naked, ummm, and all other most wonderfulls of summer happen. I am not too bad with this heat, I kinda like it...

Anyways, My friend sent me this lovely article about intentional communities and the economics of sharing. I think this will become less and less a "out there-hippie-idea" and more and more mainstream as the economy worsens. It just makes sense, and life isn't about having a lot of your own stuff, but, well, other things. What do we teach kids the moment they start to play with others..."SHARE!" A hard lesson to learn when you are 2. I think rest of us need to learn it too.

turning point

When we visited Canmore a few weeks ago, it really felt like a turning point in our lives. A little break between one life, and another. Between life with one baby, to a life with a boy and a babe. Life a of a working mom, to a home mom.
An now a couple weeks later those changes have become our reality. My boy has been potty trained (amazing), and goes to bed easier. We have made preparations for the babe, down to packing for the hospital, organizing closets, ordering lambskins from the internet...and I feel so much more connected with my boy. I realize now that our madness over the last months has been so much related to the fact we were dealing with an exhausted boy. We were just surviving through the three days I worked, because it was simply impossible to get him to bed early enough, when he was waking at 6:30...Our routine has settled in, and my boy has started to blossom. Its is such a joy to see. Not that I regret that I worked, and completed my exams, those are accomplishments I value. But I am so enjoying this little reward!

echoes - journal inspiration

Have you seen what these ladies are doing with echoes? I am really enjoying this blog, where three ladies post regularly these lovely watercolour journal entries that are a combination of images and text. So many of them are inspiring and thought provoking. They remind me of some of the work I have done in the past, and it makes me want to get back to it. I love the small water colour format as that is totally convenient in my life right now. Ive done a few that I will post...maybe there will be more to come.